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Thursday, February 2, 2012

Judgies {Baby Monitor Drama}

Oh the baby monitor, how I loved thee.
Notice my suffix at the end of love.
 Once sweet C face started sleeping in his own room at 6 weeks I become obsessed with my drug dealer.
The drug was of course my sweet C face and my dealer was his Monitor.
And boy was I addicted quicker than you can say Xanax.
I would find myself waking up in the middle of the night STARING at the light bright monitor.
My face was lit up and I was in a trance.
I was sleeping with my dang eyes open.
I wanted to see what that baby was doing in there.
He was obviously sleeping like I should be.
So what in the hell was I doing.
I was already sleep deprived and now once I can get some sleep I am up!

So I did it.
I cut the cord.
I yanked that monitor out of both of our rooms faster than you can say Sleepy Mama.
Once Operation No Monitor was put in place, I slept like a sweet babe.
Me, this Mama, the Mama who loves sleep.
I could sleep 12 + hours with no problem, no signs of guilt or groggyness the next morning.

You see, our house is pretty small and I could hear if he was crying or unhappy.
So, I didn't really have a problem with it.
Plus with my new found sleeping I was in pure heaven.
So no more monitor for us since sweet babe was like 8 or 9 weeks old.

But you know what?
Once my no monitor policy comes into conversation with my friends,
you would think that I was nominated as the "World's Worst Parent".
I get the judgies flying at me left and right.
I get the...
"But what do you mean you don't use a monitor? How could you not use your monitor?"
"How do you hear if your child is crying or upset?"
"But why? Don't you feel it's cruel?"
"Don't you want to know whats going on in there?"
"But what if he is choking?"
"How do you know if he is sleeping or not?"
"My monitor is my lifeline, I have to know whats going on in there."

Ok, all of these comments are fine and dandy.
Well not really but whateve and I of course immediatly fire off obsentites in my head once they start in on me.
But judge away...
You my friend do what you want and what works for you and I'm going to do me and my family.
Ummmm K.
This works for us.
If you remember right, friend, my babe was sleeping through the night at 8 weeks.
Yeah, remember that.
Still jealous aren't that why you are hating on my no monitor policy?
Our whole entire household is actually getting  sleep.
And it's quite amazing!

So while our house is snoozing away you are staring at that monitor wondering whats going on in there.
And why?
You see your child is sleeping like an angel.
That is exactly what is going on in there.
And if my child is upset I can hear him.
Are you telling me that you can't hear your child crying when you don't have your monitor?
If not, you might want to get your hearing checked.
And no, no, I don't find it cruel that I don't use a monitor.
Remember your mom saying to you "well we didn't have those fancy wipe warmers or those nice swings when you were born".
Well same, same for the video monitor.
And look, you my friend, are still here and alive.
Ah-mazing isn't it.
And are you telling me that you will know when your child is choking?
You must be a mind-reader and make millions because you have won the lottery, because again you are a mind reader and can predict life and death.
Again, Ah-mazing!
If my child is not sleeping, well then what am I going to do about it?
Yes, I can rock that sweet babe but that doesn't guarantee sleep.
Especially not with a Toddler.
So, he will eventually go to sleep and it will probably in 10-15 mins after you put him down.
So let it be.
Let your child or toddler try and put himself to sleep.
This is all part of trying to grow into a regular well adjusted person.

So, when I tell you I don't use a monitor, don't look at me like I'm cray cray.
It works.
Maybe you should try it.
I get at least 8.5 to 9 + hours of sleep a night.
And its pure delight.


Unknown said...

I know NOTHING about video monitors. I think they were just coming out when my 8 year old was an infant. For him, we used our Sony monitor that we received as a gift when our 10 year old was born. Yeah, we were using an oldie, but a goodie. And, I'll be honest, the monitor was hardly ever used...even when my kids were infants.

I totally get where you're coming from. Kudos to you on your blissful slumber and thank you for standing up not only for yourself, but for all of the other mamas out there who go with their gut. :)


Anonymous said...

I have a bad relationship with my video monitor. I'm getting better, but it has caused me to be a little obsessive and hindered my baby from being able to go to sleep on his own because I was in there as soon as I saw him move. It's ridiculous, but I'm doing better!

Anonymous said...

We have only used a monitor maybe two times, and T has also slept through the night since around 8 weeks. I hear every peep without a monitor! No judgies!

Baby Shopaholic said...

Well I am jello of all the sleep you get!!! We use a reg monitor because we can't hear her until she is screaming at the top of her lungs! Maybe that is what we should wait for....

Lindsey said...

We don't have a video monitor, nor do I plan on ever getting one. And like you, I turned our monitor down to the lowest setting, turn the fan on high, and snooze away. If something is REALLY the matter, he would be screaming bloody murder. I don't need his little whimpers to keep me from sleeping.

Whatever happened to mother's intuition and learning your kids' cries? You know, the difference between, I am pissed I have to go to bed and something is really the matter. Sheesh!

Happiness Is... said...

We have one, but I am with you on that stupid light - WHY does it have to be so freaking bright? I turn ours down volume wise and often turn the light off, too. Every mother can hear their baby - it's engrained in us!

Unknown said...

my parents raised me with the "leave her be" philosophy from about 6 weeks on. they got sleep, I got sleep. it worked for them. I definitely think it's up to each individual family - but good for you for looking out for yourself too! those good night sleeps are important :)

Kate @ Daffodils said...

I have never used a monitor for my boys and I have never had a problem hearing them. I think people can get so attached to their monitors and jump at the first rustle a baby makes. Kids have to figure some things out on their own. I 100% agree that everyone sleeps better without one!

Courtney said...

I only use the monitor 3 times a day. 2 naps and bedtime. Only because we live in a 2 story house. Once I go to bed it goes off.